Being selfish in a relationship is a common thing among those who are in love. Many people confuse this with loving themselves and knowing their value. However, self love can be portrayed without having to make everything about yourself. Learn to always accommodate your partner so that they do not feel left out and eventually quit trying to be recognized. The following are some of the warning signs of a selfish person.

1. You love to use the word “I”

Constant use of ‘I’ in a relationship wouldn’t sit well with the one you love. You must be doing most of the things together and to use a singular term all the time kinda gives your other half a sense that they are not included. If you are in a dedicated love triangle, you would begin to use plural to describe most of the things.

2. You are so nagging

A nagging individual could be jealous or selfish. Each person in the relationship have their time to do their own things for example job. So if you are always on their neck, it means that you do not value what they do, you just want all the attention to be on you. Which is not good, because it means that you only care about you and not them. Learn to be reasonable and give your partner the opportunity to also build their dream.

3. All you do is talk about yourself

Even when chilling and having small talks, do you always make every discussion about you? If so, you are being selfish. There is need to maintain a balance in the relationship, give your partner time to also talk of the things they experienced among many other. Do not just make the other person a listener and not a contributor. Doing this will make them get bored easily.

4. You never try to entice your partner

This instances mainly happen when one is fond of complaining that they do not get the treatment they deserve yet they do not lift a finger to do the same to their partner too. Do not let the relationship be one sided. Even small surprises are appreciated. For example you can cook a juicy meal that they enjoy and you will see much more done to you in return.

5. You are a poor listener

Poor listening skills arise when you are either too busy to heed to what you are being told or you do not care. As expected when you love someone, you would pay attention to what they say as it is important to you. However, if you find yourself not having a glue of some essential things they said, then you ought to be selfish. Leave alone the normal forgetting, there is this habit of even forgetting precious dates, especially when they never forget yours.

6. You are poor at understanding

Empathy is the most essential factor in any relationship. When problems arise, you do not have to be so hard on your partner, put yourself in their shoes first before you judge them. This enables you to make sound decisions and reason together on the way out. The relationship will last and even work when you uphold empathy.

7. You want to be the one to make all decisions

Everyone’s opinion matters, so if you are always trying to take control of all the decisions in the relationship then you are one selfish individual. Make your partner feel they are a priority by giving them the chance to also decide on some things or even argue their point out. However, if you suffocate them, they will not hold their breathe for long.

8. You always think you are right

Everyone makes mistakes, thinking that you are right all the time is selfish. All you do is blame your partner for the mistakes you make. Using words such as, “if you had not done this…”, “this is all your fault….” among many more. In order to keep thriving in that relationship, you need to learn to apologize and take responsibility.

9. You need your partner only when you need something

This often happens with individuals who are fond of saying they are so busy to call yet when it comes to them needing something from you, they will not hesitate to contact you even with ‘their busy schedule’.

10. You never introduce your partner to anybody

Many people have fallen victims to these kind of situations. This means that you do not think that introducing them to others is a big deal to them. Much worse, you do not care about their feelings because you think all that matters is you.


Relationships involve two people and when one turns out to be selfish, it begins to feel like a one person thing. Once this happens, it wouldn’t be long before it ends unless something is quickly done to solve the issue. Always ensure that your partner feel they are included.



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