In the article Solving conflicts in a relationship without causing a fight, we discussed some of the ways you can adopt to get a solution peacefully. However, it is so unfortunate that most couples, do not try and solve these things no matter how wrong someone is. They just overlook them and it gets you wondering why? And you would find that this thing keeps eating them on the inside. The following reasons could explain that;
1. Fear of the outcome
This is not a surprise actually. When it comes to relationships or rather love matters, there are so many things that many have to consider. Take for example and individual who has been heartbroken severally. The moment they find someone they think is right for them, they wouldn’t want to let go. So, even when they disagree/have issues with the person, they would rather ignore and not talk about it because they fear it could break them up if they happen to bring it up. Well, this is not good for anyone, if someone wrongs you and do not see the need to apologize, then they are not good for you. It even means that you will eventually break up due to poor communication and emotional abuse.
2. Fear of the person
Aside fearing the outcome, most people would rather not solve their conflicts because they fear the individual they are with. They are scared of what they will say, what the will do and how they will react in general. So, in this scenario, they would just let the person off the hook without even trying to find a solution. To be frank, the above is just a description of an abusive relationship, why would you want to undergo emotional or even physical torture for a person who does not seem to value you. Love is not about perseverance, it is about living a life of joy.
3. Not knowing how to start
Most individuals do not solve their squabbles, because they cannot even comprehend how to begin. You are just pacing from one idea to another trying to the most suitable way to start. This shows that you are with someone who is so defensive. And in the past, you must have experienced the same issue. Where you have all the reasons to be right but somehow you end up telling them sorry. What this does to you is destroy your self esteem, confidence and your ability to take control of your life. It is as if you are waiting for someone else to take the wheel of your life.
4. They want to feel their relationship is perfect
Have you ever been out with friends, and then everyone is talking about how they disagree with their partners often? Then there is this one person who just says, ” imagine we do not disagree with mine.” This is a clear indication that the are actually dating themselves or in best terms, they are in the relationship alone. Everyone experiences challenges, it is just they way you solve them that matters. So, if you intend on making your relationship look spotless, you are living a lie and at the same time suffering in secret.
5. It has become an habit
When issues are always an resolved, you tend to become accustomed to the habit. Things happen and you just act as if nothing did. Well, this will not go on for long, you know why? Because one of you will eventually get tired, actually the best term is bored. And, when this happens, there is no looking back. Do not let bad habits be a norm, live a life that is fun and exciting.
6. They already know the answer
Have you ever had a partner, who almost gets their way in everything? If yes, let’s roll, if not, well try and relate. There are people out there, no matter how wrong they are, they will always be right. Take for example someone you have proof of their infidelity. But despite all this, they will find a way to turn the wheels to you and put the blame on you. Trying by all means to justify how it is your fault they cheated. There is no justification for some mistakes, and if someone is not ready to man up and apologize, they do not deserve you at all.
7. Poor communication skills
Communication is a key feature in any relationship. Without it, you can never get to be open with your issues, and even if you decide to solve them, you never get to a solution. Someone would choose to suffer on the inside, because they do not know how to express themselves, or because they fear to feel embarrassed. Learn to reassure our partner of our love and you will see them being open and honest to you.
The most evident reason here why most people do not resolve their issues in relationships, amounts to being in bad unions. When you are in a healthy romance, things do not go unresolved because everyone respects the other. Be vigilant on the type of relationship you are in, is it growing you or putting you down?