Grudges are normal to each and every being. Many at times we tend to encounter disappointments life, and its so unfortunate that we cant avoid them we just have got devise ways to deal with grudges that developed as a result of them. For a displeasure to develop into a grudge that must have been some serious issue. Some resentments you got about somebody could do you more harm than good, with time hostility and need for retaliation could build up in you. Any attempt to try and get back at the person who hurt you most, could it be a family member, friend or your relationship partner would lead to more harm.
And since I wouldn’t want anyone to nurture that grudge into something much more destructive, here are some ways to try and let go of it, I know the act could be hard but this is for your own good.
1.Figure out the root cause of your grudge
What is it that made you feel this way about another individual. Was it what they said to you? was it what they did to you? or was it what they did not do to you?. Ask yourself such types of questions and once you are fully aware of why you have a grudge on somebody then you can find ways to solve this problem. Sometimes even, some grudges find their solution on this first step, because the person after weighing the options of the disappointment they realize that they have been so worked up on a mere issue or rather an issue not worth getting disappointed in.
2.Connect with somebody
At all costs try and find somebody to talk to about how you feel. It takes a lot of energy, emotional and physical strain to harbor all those resentments. You need to share them with somebody you feel you can trust or even the person who caused you the pain. You cant imagine the satisfaction that falls on you once you release the tension in your body, once you offload the heaviness that you had before. When I say someone you trust, I mean the person that you feel comfortable with and know won’t judge you for your actions. Pour your heart out to them, even if it means crying, just let that sorrow out of your soul and finally you will feel free.
3.Relinquish the grudge
Aren’t you tired enough of carrying around the grudge, you gotta step up and give your body space to breath and feel good. If you love yourself enough you will understand what am saying. In case you have been waiting long for the person who hurt you to apologize then stop wasting time and focus on building yourself, regarding the consequences that come with holding a grudge, you will realize that you are worth more than being unhappy. This is very true, we are all worth of being happy in this world, rid yourself of negative thoughts and live your life because grudges are meant to be in the past.
4.Stop re-living the moment
Most of us would cherish reliving the moment that they were hurt. They would want to stick to not forgetting what they were done to, as if its the most precious thing to hold on to. I know its hard to forget some serious sorrows in our lives but I would wish if you engage your mind in other actions such as being happy, having a day out with friends, chilling with your family among other things that help you block negativity out of your mind. After a period of time trying to forget, eventually you will.
Most of the people always forget to include this virtue in their lives. Forgiveness is something so special as it helps each individual to deal with hurt and disappointments in a whole new level. It aids us to live a stress free life with those who have inflicted our emotions. Am certain that most people have realized that, when an individual hurts you and you don’t try getting back at them, they would start feeling guilty for their actions and some would even come apologize. However, this is not always the case, forgiveness is always from within and you do not have to tell them that you have pardon them. What matters most is when you are at peace.
6.Look at the positive side
Every story has got the positive and the negative side. It is your choice whether to dwell in the positive or negative side. But we tend to take the hard way in most occasions, we want to hold on to that which remind us of the bad times we have had. We need to realize that holding onto the negative leads us to a darker side full of harm and hurt. Let us consider learning from the hurt, let the disappointments take us ahead and not behind. Find the strength in your weaknesses rather than dwelling in them and blaming others.
7.Weigh each side of the story
Put yourself in the shoes of those that hurt you and you could be able to justify their actions once you understand their situations. You never know what prompted the actions of an individual until you look into the matter. Once you comprehend this, you will definitely be in much more harmony. Though this wouldn’t make it right for them to hurt you, but its worth finding out for your own sake.
I hope this article helps you in case you are trying to get rid of a grudge. As you read it, keep it in mind that in any path that you decide to take, it has got to have some impact in your life. Choosing the positive side won’t hurt you. Please decide what’s best for you!!
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